.Publisher's Note: The complying with is the text of a letter from Trip Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reassessing the activities of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't created quite concerning specifics of this particular objective throughout the month I've been actually here, mostly for two reasons: the very first being actually that there has been actually extremely little time to accomplish that kind of creating, and the second thing is since I am actually not exactly sure how pleasant I am sharing thought and feelings I show family and friends with the remainder of the globe.Well, undoubtedly the world changed today. What I claim or carry out is actually incredibly small reviewed to the value of what occurred to our country today when it was actually assaulted through ... through whom? Revolutionaries is actually all we understand, I suspect. Tough to know at whom to drive our rage as well as fear ...I had just completed a lot of jobs this morning, the best taxing being actually the physical exams of all staff members. In an exclusive chat following that, the air travel surgeon told me they were possessing a really bad day on the ground. I had no tip ...He explained the scenario to me as best he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually made speechless, at that point frightened. My very first thought and feelings was that this had not been an actual conversation, that I was still listening to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply didn't seem feasible on this incrustation in our country. I could not also envision the details, even prior to the headlines of additional destruction started can be found in.Vladimir came by quite promptly, sensing that something really severe was being actually reviewed. I swung Michael into the component at the same time. They were actually likewise astonished and also stunned. After our company signed off, I attempted to clarify to Vladimir and also Michael as greatest I might the possible measurement of the show of fear in midtown Manhattan and also at the Pentagon. They accurately comprehended as well as were actually incredibly understanding.I eyed the World Chart on the computer system to observe where over the globe our company were actually as well as observed that our company were happening southeast away from Canada and would certainly be skipping New England in a couple of minutes. I whized around the station until I found a home window that would offer me a view of New York City and also snatched the closest cam. It occurred to become a video camera, and also I was appearing southern coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke appeared to possess an odd blossom to it at the bottom of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the area. After checking out among the news articles our experts merely received, I believe our team were actually checking out NY around the amount of time of, or quickly after, the collapse of the second tower. Just how dreadful ...I swept the electronic camera during the East Shore to the south to see if I could find some other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, yet nothing at all showed up.It was actually fairly complicated to deal with job afterwards, though our experts had some to perform, yet on the next track our company crossed the US further southern. All three people were actually operating one or two video cameras to attempt to obtain viewpoints of The big apple or Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, but no particular resource might be observed. It all looked amazing from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can't visualize the unfortunate scenes on the ground.Aside from the emotional influence of our country being dealt with as well as lots of our consumers and also perhaps some buddies being gotten rid of, the absolute most mind-boggling feeling being where I am actually is among seclusion.Upcoming day ... I presume the fatigue as well as emotional stress got the very best of me. I couldn't keep awake and remain to create. Today was still complicated, yet our company started obtaining more info, plus our team possessed the tribute of talking directly with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, that ensured us that the ground staffs would remain to work and also guarantee our safety, along with the risk-free operation of the Place. Our team additionally talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that included that the companions in the Program are all absolutely committed to proceeding risk-free procedures and support. These were actually certainly never concerns for me. I understand all these individuals! The ground crews have actually been extremely helpful, really understanding of the influence of the updates, and have actually tried to become as helpful as achievable. They have actually all been actually quite professional and concentrated though I can't think of the interruption of this sort of news being available in as well as the idea that authorities structures could be in jeopardy. They never avoided a beat, also when moving nerve center. And a team of elderly staffs as well as close friends provided us a pretty thorough briefing about what was actually understood and what was actually being done in the authorities as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was incredibly handy as well as kind of all of them to do in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has additionally been supporting and also helpful, attempting to uplink newspaper article when our very own possessions were inoperable, and also pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have been actually wonderful, as well. They recognize it is actually been a difficult time for me and the individuals on the ground, and also they have actually attempted to be as also keeled and useful as achievable. Michael also fixed me my favored Borscht soup for supper. As well as they offer me loads of area to think when I needed it. They are incredibly sympathetic as well as of course outraged at whoever would perform this.I understand plenty of folks in Washington, plenty of folks who take a trip to DC as well as New York City, many who are pilots, that I experienced certain I would certainly receive at least a few parts of bad news over the following handful of days. I received the 1st one today when I discovered that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that reached the Pentagon was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I found Chic throughout plebe summer months when our team resided in the D&B with each other, and also our experts had lots of courses with each other. I can not visualize what he must of undergone, and right now I listen to that he may have climbed even further than we may also think about by probably stopping his aircraft coming from being actually the one to attack the White House. What an awful loss, however I ensure Chic was battling bravely throughout. And rips do not move the same in space ...It is actually tough to illustrate just how it really feels to be the only American fully off the world at a time including this. The emotion that I should exist with each of you, dealing with this, assisting somehow, is actually difficult. I recognize that our team perform the threshold (or past) of a horrendous shift in the history of the planet. A lot of traits will definitely certainly never coincide once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the 1000s as well as lots of individuals straight had an effect on by these horrendous actions of violence, but most likely for all of us. Our company will certainly discover our own selves experiencing in different ways concerning dozens of things, including most likely room exploration, regrettably.It's terrible to view smoke putting from wounds in your personal nation from such an excellent viewpoint. The dichotomy of being on a space probe dedicated to boosting daily life on the planet and seeing life being actually damaged through such deliberate, dreadful process is actually jolting to the psyche, no matter who you are. And the know-how that every little thing will definitely be various than when our company released due to the time we land is a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our country and also in our management that we will certainly do every little thing feasible to far better protect her and our households, and to bring justice of what has been actually performed. I possess confidence that the great people at NASA will certainly do every little thing needed to continue our purpose carefully as well as return us safely at the correct time. As well as I skip all of you quite. I can not exist with you personally, and also we have a very long way to visit finish our objective, yet be actually particular that my soul is along with you, as well as understand you are in my requests.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the last letter ... The good news is, it's been actually a busy full week up below. And to show that, like our country, our company are continuing on our designated course along with service as usual (as high as achievable). Tonight the current add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Compartment will be released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday evening (United States time), it will certainly dock along with our company, at a slot never used before on the nadir edge of the Service Module. This new element will certainly offer us yet another location to dock a Progress or Soyuz and will offer a big airlock along with two useable hatches for carrying out EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which our experts are going to perform a few of prior to our team get back.The problem before in handling this week was insufficient headlines. The concern now is excessive. It came simultaneously when email was brought back, and there's not nearly enough opportunity to review it all! Plus it's as well hard to cope with all of it instantly. Yet I enjoy receiving it, as well as I really appreciate the terrific characters of help as well as friendship I am actually obtaining.Our team are actually prospering aboard, getting our job done, and also discussing things. Final evening our experts had a long conversation over supper regarding the value of these events, the feasible actions to observe, and what ought to be actually performed. After supper, Michael made a point of telling me that every e-mail he acquired from friends in Russia said exclusively to tell me just how sorry they were that this occurred, expanding their condolences, as well as asking exactly how I was performing. Vladimir educated me the Russian term for "acknowledgements" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Urban area. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are actually a lot too lengthy to verbalize easily.) Extremely types people.For the last two days, the Russian MCC has been good enough to transmit online broadcasts of broadcast information concerning the celebration and linked tales, to ensure I was actually effectively informed. Every specialist that has actually begun the line to discuss an operation or an issue contends some aspect extended hellos to me with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that as a result of the special day of remembrance in the United States, throughout the day people had been actually delivering florals as well as edging all the wall surfaces of the US consular office in Moscow, and this night they were lighting candle lights in the street outside the consulate. Exactly how the world has modified.Folks all over seem to be to identify the senselessness as well as terror in this assault. And the significant reduction. Moscow has handled these kind of issues in the last few years with apartment as well as train bombings, so they are as troubled to do away with this danger as our company are actually. But all-time low line is actually that there are actually excellent people anywhere that would like to live in peace. I read that a little one talked to, "The United States is actually therefore excellent to various other nations, our experts always help every person, exactly how can they hate us a great deal?".I hope the instance of teamwork and also count on that this space probe and all the people in the plan demonstrate daily will at some point motivate the remainder of the globe to operate similarly. They must!Unfortunately, our team won't be taking flight over the US while folks are lighting candles. Do not understand if our company could find that anyway. We carried out, however, view a quite unique as well as beautiful attraction a handful of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz enhancer. Our company were actually eclipsing it and it came into view regarding 3 minutes after its launch from Baikonur as the sunshine struck our station, so it was still at night. It appeared like a sizable comet with a straight, large tail silhouetted against the dark world under. Despite some poor illumination for some time as the sunlight reached our window at a low angle, I managed some video clip of it as initially we passed the spacecraft, and after that saw it start to mesmerize as it gained altitude as well as velocity. I filmed till primary motor deadline as well as enhancer splitting up happened just as we moved toward sunup on the Mountain ranges. An unforgettable sight in an extraordinary week ...Life goes on, even precede. Our company are actually below to stay ... Frank.